Imagine

Moved

2008-11-22T18:24:00.005+08:00

Something new

2008-11-20T23:27:00.010+08:00

Somebody got an early birthday present (which is actually not anytime soon - March).

Mirzan's "mama" and "papa" appeared at the door with a package in hand.

Inline skates!

This boy got his pair before I got mine pfft.

But I have to say, he's a fast-learner. It was like baby taking his first steps again.

He could move on his own in less than half-hour. Way to go baby!

He's such an active boy I guess it's good to have something new and challenging for him to pick up on and channel all that energy towards. He loves it so much I think he'll wear it to sleep.

Wee new skates!

Putting it on.

"Mama" helping him gain balance.

Tired, but happy :)

Britain is outraged

2008-11-18T00:33:00.017+08:00

(source: mirror.co.uk)

This little blue-eyed cutie known as "Baby P", was only 17-months-old when he died. And he lived a (very short) life that was probably a thousand times rougher than any of ours. To cut long story short, his Mummy didn't give him the love every toddler should receive.

But if someone's hungry for a long story, here it is (chipped off The New Paper):

"The toddler had been visited 60 times by social workers. A doctor examined him, but missed the fact that the child had a broken back and eight fractured ribs. His mother managed to explain away his constant bruises time and time again, sometimes even smearing the wounds with chocolate to hide them."

"Last week, his mother, her boyfriend, and their tenant were found guilty of causing his death. The Times reported that Baby P had been in the sole care of his mother, who lives in North London, since she split from his father when the child was 3 months old, after she had affairs with two men."

"Her 32-year-old live-in boyfriend treated him even more brutally, using him 'like a punching bag' and treating him worse than the family pet..."

"Investigators said that after the boyfriend moved in, not one item of the boy's clothing was left unstained with blood. While the mother chatted with friends online, her boyfriend would beat the boy, swinging him around by the neck or legs and pinching him.

He also forced Baby P to obey commands like a dog. A snap of the fingers meant the boy would have to sit with his head bent between his legs. Another snap 20 minutes later would be the signal that he could sit upright again.

Other instances of abuse included placing the boy on a stool and spinning it around until he fell off. As Baby P grew too old for milk and jars of baby food, he was forced to scavenge bits of broken biscuits from older children and was even seen eating dirt in the garden."

It seemed social workers never noticed his injuries. A doctor noticed marks on the boy. The mother said he "bruised easily". The same doctor later referred Baby P to hospital for a head injury. Mother said he was a "head-banger".

The boyfriend was said to enjoy torturing animals and would skin frogs alive before breaking their legs (this dude's a serious nutcase).

3 Aug, Baby P was found stiff and blue in his blood-spattered cot. The Guardian reported even as the ambulance crew tried to rush him to hospital, the mother demanded they wait while she got her ciggies. This mum's a real f------ b----!

Baby P was pronounced dead on arrival. He suffered more than 50 injuries at the hands of his mother.

(source: mirror.co.uk)

"Physical injuries included eight broken ribs, a broken back and the missing top of a finger, while the emotional damage was almost incalculable. Despite it all, Baby P was said to have still attempted a smile." - Times Online

R.I.P. little baby.

Baby likes to Move It

2008-11-17T14:29:00.002+08:00

Mirzan dancing to Madagascar's theme song, with a bit of big brother talking.

A Limo spotted

2008-11-17T11:48:00.006+08:00

I forgot the name of this road, somewhere after Chinatown. I gawked when it drove in and stopped opposite from where we were. It's a frigging limo in SG!!! And this time a real one, not the white Mercedes cab that they call "limo".

Memories of the red bricks

2008-11-13T15:05:00.019+08:00

(source: timesofmylife.wordpress.com)

It used to be known as the Red Brick Library to many who visited it. It was the Motherhouse of Books, only cos it was the National Library since the 60s. I used to go there with my family. It was located next to the National Museum. It was always such a thrill going there. Recently, it was demolished. The kopitiam, that I went to after visiting the library just a short walk away at the corner of the road too was taken away to build the Fort Canning Tunnel.

The road that used to be in front of the library is now replaced by grass, pavements, and an SMU building. And in place of the library is now an escalator. As funny as it sounds, but I have proof. The escalator leads up to Fort Canning Hill. I kind of miss going up that slope to the porch of the library.

(what remains of it today, escalator in place of library. on the left, is entrance to Fort Canning Tunnel.)

(a presence marked, and National Museum)

(Escalator on grass)

(up ahead, SMU)

(kopitiam was next to white building)

More history of our National Library (timesofmylife.wordpress.com).

Live forever

2008-11-12T15:50:00.003+08:00

When you were younger, you probably know you can't touch a lot of the things in the house or else you'd get a good smack or scolding from the parents. But when you're older, you realise you can touch things in the house (whether it belongs to parents or not) without really having to ask.

So my itchy hands began rummaging through my parents drawers. And I began discovering a lot of cards, letters, love letters. Some were funny, some were sad. I can't believe I got my mum a Loony Tunes card for her last birthday. I realised she laminated some family photos with messages written on the back for us. And I got to see the things dad wrote to her.

One thing I've learned is if we can and want to retain a certain memory, it helps if we take a photo or document it somewhere with the date, venue, and what we remember most about it. Cos if we grow real old, our brain's not gonna be fresh forever. But perhaps seeing the picture or reading smth about it might trigger the memory.

But say if we don't live long enough, at least we've left a part of us for whoever's still alive in the family to see.

I have to be honest, I'm so afraid to die. I had another nightmare of dying. But this time everyone's going to die. There was a collective understanding that soon everyone would pass at the same time. We didn't know the exact time and day but we knew it was soon. I hugged everyone close to me and said my last words. I took all of mum's things, held it tight and closed my eyes, hoping sleeping would make the 'transition' into wherever life after death brings us, easier.

Then Mirzan jolted me awake "Kakak wake up, wake up". I've never felt better about being alive.

Worth the watch

2008-11-08T08:41:00.004+08:00

The Curious Case of Benjamin Button (by David Fincher)

"I was born under unusual circumstances"

Coming out Christmas (US)

Cannot say "lah" or "yah"!

2008-11-04T01:13:00.014+08:00

What Mirzan is teaching me.

"Eh you say lah! Miss Wong say cannot say lah!"

Today in 2 hours alone when conversing with him he caught me saying it at least 20 to 30 times. As much as I tried to stop myself, I found myself saying it sub-consciously. "Eh you say lah, again!"

I want to do it cos I do want him to practice the language properly besides our everyday 'lahs' 'lors' 'orhs' and 'yahs' since he's already on the right track.

"Next time you must think first.. use your brain and think. Promise you don't say lah or yah again?" holding out his cute pinkie.

I took his pinkie in mine in a swift and said "Yalah, yalah".

"YOU SAY YALAH AGAIN!!"

Oops!

When something sweet turns bitter

2008-11-02T01:17:00.002+08:00

Hardly Working: Girlfriend - CHTV

When big boys move

2008-10-28T01:10:00.002+08:00

It's kind of cute. Gary Brolsma is one of the greatest internet celebrities and it all started from harmless fun of moving to the Numa Numa song and uploading it on YouTube. Known as the Numa Numa guy, he runs a website called newnuma.com .

Magic pinch

2008-10-27T23:37:00.004+08:00

It's that special pinch. That sends millions of watts of jolt into the mind and soul, instantly giving the 'wake up' we need. It occurs once in a blue moon. And when it does, it makes the body cringe in fear of scary possibilities. It makes the brain rethink and create new paths. The body screams "Revamp revamp!"

The time to enjoy is now. Less time for stressing over problems. Less time for self-pity. Less time for wandering. Less time for complaining. Execution has to begin now. Make the best out of things now. Appreciation and gratitude.

When life gives you lemons, make lemonade.

If you want to hug your cat, hug it. If you need to apologize to your friend, apologize. Life is too short for waiting. Life is too short for lingering. Because you might not be able to do it tomorrow. Or the minute after that. The divine being up there can cut the breath out of us in a split second or faster.

Time and tide waits for no man. (Ruz's fav. quote teehee, not sure if it still is)

When I was little, mum kissed me goodnight every night and I asked her why. She said, in case she doesn't see me the next day. I guess at least I go to sleep knowing mum loves me. I kind of miss her strawberry kisses now but nothing I can do about it. So I spread it on. I'm kind of awkward in showing love to dad and Mat. But Mirzan and the lloved one. Like Mirzan, when I first see him in the day I hug him tight and kiss him on the cheek. Then after that I keep wanting to hug him. He'll probably get sick of it one day haha, but I don't care.

Live life with no regrets. The time to act is now!

Apparently

2008-10-25T00:55:00.003+08:00

This is what I've learned from watching the lives of a group of boxers.

They're not just a group of dumb dudes going around flailing their arms around trying to knock their opponent out. I mean that's their motive usually but that's not who they are. Like artists, this is their passion. They can 'paint a picture' with their punches. They have to have footwork to move around fast enough.

We were discussing around the room few weeks back. Maybe boxers are good dancers. They move well with their feet. While watching one of the Contender matches, someone behind me shouted "Dance baby, dance!" He's a local boxing trainer, screaming to a fighter in the ring.

If their rhythm is good, they can beat the opponent. Cos some fighters don't really have rhythm and would find it hard to keep up.

Here's a short clip of Ali dancing, since I'm on abit of Ali craze now. But he is indeed the greatest! Watch the legs.

"The Greatest"

2008-10-24T23:50:00.005+08:00

Muhammad Ali.

Such a clever man who spoke with great poetry. A man who always knew what he wanted and got it. I can't help but research him. I've been watching boxing footage day in and out.

It all started when he was 12, and his bicycle was stolen. He ran up to a policeman, Joe Martin, fuming. Turns out, Joe runs his own gym and trained the boy to box. From there it began.

After Ali had converted to Muslim he was supposed to join the Vietnam War. But he didn't. He was furious at the thought that black people were not treated right, but still had to put on a uniform and "continue the domination of white slave masters" by murdering another nation.

"I ain't got no quarrel with them Viet Cong... they never called me nigger."

He said war is against the teachings of the Qur'an.

"I'd rather face machine gunfire before, uh, deviate from the teachings of almighty God and the religion of Islam."

1967, Ali was stripped of his heavyweight title and boxing license due to his refusal to join the Armed Forces on religious grounds. 3 years later, he was vindicated by the US Supreme Court and returned to the ring.

Ali on how he'd like to be remembered

Already know

2008-10-24T22:55:00.002+08:00

Patience is a good way to go.

Not the only way, but one of many ways.

Don't let the heart jump before you.

Maybe what I'm saying is not even logical cos I'm sleepy now.

Patience is divine. In my opinion. I just forget to do it sometimes.

Patience is the companion of wisdom. In Saint Augustine's opinion.

But I agree. Good one Saint Augustine.

I'm so grateful to have the ability to see, hear, touch, taste, smell. I thank god everyday for it. People who walk around with one hand, people who can't see and have to depend on the stick, people who weren't born normal. Most of them would want to be in our shoes. For some reason I see many of them nowadays. And you know what they say, you're there for a reason. Made to witness these things that makes you rethink and rethink.

I'm happy. No matter how unhappy I am, I'm happy.

Don't know what

2008-10-24T22:30:00.003+08:00

It's so hard to stay optimistic when you're feeling pessimist.

But you know positive is the way to go.

So go.

But you don' feel like budging.

You feel like remaining negative cos the feeling seems right.

Sensitivity, shut up. you're doing too good a job.

iRack

2008-10-22T23:02:00.003+08:00

A new product of Apple, iRack - MadTV.

Trunk-ated

2008-10-22T21:52:00.001+08:00

There's a big elephant in the room I can't seem to get rid of.

Imagine

2008-10-22T02:07:00.003+08:00

Smiles!

Dedicated to a certain baby monster whom I love, Mirzan.

With photos taken by another lloved one, Mohd Faiz.

I hope Mirzan never loses his magic of imagination growing up. Cos he inspires people like that. People like his big sister. And sometimes it's funny watching him amuse himself with his own make believe stories and watch him laugh at it, and having fun with it. You just can't help but smile.

Randy's last lecture

2008-10-20T23:59:00.003+08:00

This is a great example of how we could try and live life right, but still be hit by a fast-killing disease. Dr Randy Pausch excercises everyday, he tries to eat right but is one day hit by Pancreatic cancer. Later told that he has months to live. Randy has to try stay positive, for he will be leaving behind a loving wife and 3 beautiful young children. He won't be able to watch them grow up to be big boys, or grow old with his wife.

But he accepted it, and helped to raise awareness for Pancreatic Cancer before he died. Being a researcher himself, Randy, says the researches going towards Pancreatic cancer isn't well-funded. He believes that if it is, they might be able to find more ways to help patients rather than just chemotherapy and radiation.

Here he is on Oprah, with his Last Lecture, talking about achieving childhood dreams and sharing lessons he learned in life.

On the blanket of white

2008-10-19T20:22:00.003+08:00

30 Seconds to Mars talking about the experience of being in Greenland to shoot A Beautiful Lie, the challenges they faced while shooting atop massive bodies of ice, all for a single cause of spreading that message that the Earth is not going to live as long if we don't try to help it.

Walking home with a fruit in hand

2008-10-19T19:16:00.005+08:00

Hanging at G's spot

2008-10-18T01:42:00.002+08:00

-17/10/08-

Gareth's

More !!!

It's business time!

2008-10-18T01:34:00.004+08:00

A duo from New Zealand, Flight of the Conchords, make song and comedy about sex and relationship.

They're coming!

2008-10-17T07:25:00.005+08:00

".. Avenue Q is a fabulously furry and fun-filled romp featuring an ensemble of actors and some very adult-minded puppets. It’s ‘Sesame Street’ with a very grown up twist!

You’ll meet Princeton, a fresh-faced college grad, Brian the out-of-work comedian, Internet porn addict Trekkie Monster, Nick the good-hearted slacker, Rod, his investment banker roommate who seems to be hiding a secret, kindergarten teaching assistant Kate Monster, and of course, Lucy the Slut. They get away with things that only puppets can without being arrested.

Together, Princeton and his newfound friends struggle to make it in New York City with big dreams and a tiny bank account.. [more info at SISTIC]"

DATE

30 Oct - 16 Nov 2008

Tues - Fri, 8pm

Sat & Sun, 3 pm & 8 pm

DURATION

Approx. 2 hrs 15 min

INTERVAL

20 mins

VENUE

Esplanade Theatre

Yay yay!

cos he's so cute when he says it

2008-10-14T22:07:00.001+08:00

Can I keep you?

2008-10-07T17:50:00.004+08:00

It was on clearance sale at $6.95 so I had to get it. I watched it in cinema for my 8th birthday and it made me cry. Casper is such a sad boy. I still don't know how he died. I know he was 12 and he was sick but what kind I dunno.

But he stayed behind instead of 'crossing over' to keep his father company. His father was an inventor, but people thought he was a lunatic cos he claimed he was haunted by the ghost of his dead son. He built a machine that he thought might be able to bring his son back to life.

The whole movie's accompanied by great music. Especially that sad, sad one at the short moment at the Halloween party where Casper appeared as a real boy and Kat's mother's spirit appeared to visit her father.

Here's "One Last Wish" by James Horner, the same guy who composed music for Titanic. and a video done by a Casper fan. If you love Casper too, enjoy.

Casper - One Last Wish (Secrecys)

Scientist studies

2008-10-04T21:32:00.009+08:00

Today I want to write about Mirzan, again, cos he's such a little Ronald McDonald. I enjoy writing about him.

People always say, you never know what goes through the mind of another.

I saw Mirzan grow up from when he was a tiny almost premature-like baby to a full-grown 5-year-old. You'd think you know all about someone if you've watched him from the day he was born. I thought I did, but turn out, I may be wrong.

Lately he gets mad easily. Like when he's enjoying playing PSP and a baby crawls over and innocently lays a finger on his precious device, he raises his arms high as if gonna hit the kid, and screams in a high-pitch tone "I said DON'T DISTURBBBB!!!!!" Then his face crumples up, with pursed lips, he goes "Ngrrrrrrr!!!"

While walking back with him one day, after he's had one of his baby angst moments, he explained to me.

"sometimes.. sometimes, my think (pointing to his head) make me like bad guy. then i like want to hit the orang.."

- my think = the way I think

- orang = person

I was surprised at first. I mean, he's able to understand something I probably didn't understand at his age. I said to him

"You're actually a good boy, baby."

he said

"sometimes.. sometimes i good boy.. sometimes i naughty. sometimes my think make me like bad guy.. then i angry, then my hands like this"

he shows me his clenched fist.

He understands the effect his um, brain has on him? He knows the source of his emotion and what it does to him, but he doesn't know how to help it. And it's beautiful sometimes when you hear it from the mouth of a child, the major discoveries he makes on his own. Now, we have to do something about that baby angst.

Passenger seat

2008-10-04T21:17:00.002+08:00

There's a slight bout of sorrow when you've lost a battle. Especially when you've lost much and was depending on the win to save you and your family. Let the tears free, breathe, take your loved ones in your hands, and slowly walk out of the wreckage.

Massa's pit stop accident

2008-09-29T00:37:00.002+08:00

F1 Singapore Night Race 2008

OHMUG

2008-09-28T23:58:00.014+08:00

F1 Singapore Grand Prix Preview - ESPN

I have to admit, we looked pretty good on TV with the lit up circuit. It looked like we were glowing. The race was awesome. I've never watched F1 before. And oh that drama of poor Felipe Massa of Ferrari who was in the lead, entered the pit stop but sped off before the refuelling hose was removed. He drove a good length of the pit lane before stopping, and was forced to wait for the mechanics to run over to remove the hose.

He was signalled with a green light, thus the quick exit. But the poor mechanic who was holding onto the hose got tugged and left with a neck brace. Massa ended with 13th placing. But what a spectacle, phoo.

Hello world.

And he's off!

Top view

Winner Renault's Fernando Alonso (ESPN)

Thoughts of an older sister

2008-09-28T19:45:00.007+08:00

I'm not the greatest of older sisters. But I love this boy to death, I'll do anything for him. He's my reality and fantasy, and I know anytime I need to escape he'll be there with me.

He's my dream. Whatever I couldn't really do as a kid, I let him. When I was little, I never really knew how to express thoughts or ideas. So now I have this bundle of hope with me, I let him be who he wants to be. I'm not ashamed if he screams really loud in delight in a crowd of silence. I let him roam free, be whoever he wants to be. I don't want him growing up thinking like oh, he can't say or do something because people will think like this.

That's who I was and I grew up my entire childhood lying my way. I was afraid of facing honesty. Lying was my main way out. The feeling wasn't good at all but I didn't understand.

But he isn't selfish, mostly anwyay. I'm happy about that. As an older sister earning abit of moolah once in a while, I and the family sometimes like to buy surprises (e.g. sweets, books) for Baby. That's what my father used to do, buy me surprises. So I think some of it rubbed off on him. He likes to buy sweets for his friends, or if I buy him sparklers he wants to share it with the neighbour. If he's having something nice and I ask may I have some, he readily says yes. If not, I'll call him selfish!

However, being an 'adult' surrounded in a house of adults, I sometimes forget he's only a child, a 5-year-old. Whom at this stage requires all the attention and support. So sometimes I shun him away because besides work, sometimes I feel like I need my own 'me' time.

So he waited for me. It was kind of annoying at first cos he kept knocking on the door, and asking me to come out. But he kept on waiting. Till he fell asleep outside my door.

I have to keep reminding myself, he's not an adult. He's a child. A lonely child surrounded by a house-ful of adults. It's okay to give in to him, because he needs the attention. I can have my 'me' time later when he's gone to sleep.

From now on I'll be there for him anytime he needs me cos if I don't, next time I look at him he might be a grown 15-year-old who doesn't need his older sister's attention anymore.

Life's a beef and we love it

2008-09-25T14:09:00.005+08:00

Though I'm trying not to consume it too much just thinking of all those cute, chubby cows. But I have to admit, the Thaksin Beef Noodles at Seah Im are undeniably good. Contains no MSG and pretty refreshing taste. And Raya's approaching. So them Deng Dengs (above) are a "must" once a year.

I realise Raya becomes more special for me when I reserve my stomach for most of the default Raya food like Lontong, sambal goreng, kueh tart. And for alot of us, homemade is always best. Cooked the way we know and like it to be by the hands of our mothers. With a special ingredient called love. i miss mum.

Which reminds me, we dropped by Geylang again last weekend to look for that nice baju kurung we saw on our first trip. It was grey with maroon red Roses all over. Was like one of those old, kampung style kurungs cos I'm so sick of all the funky new ones. There's no nice new ones this year, Second Chance disappointed me. I'll prolly wear one of the old ones. The relatives won't tell cos I rarely wear baju kurung anyway.

Being at Frameworks has been great so far. I met the nicest bunch of people to work with.

I started seeing the difference between interning at a production house and post- house. And I'm kinda glad I started at a production house first. I'm just thinking to myself it could be worse. But hey, everything's a learning process anyway. No matter where I landed I'd try and be happy with it anyway.

Trying to love something you've never loved before can lead to interesting discoveries. Life's a beef, I love it, and my McDelivery is on its way now hooray!

If I move my place in line, I'll lose

2008-09-23T13:12:00.005+08:00

Death Cab For Cutie - Expo '86

Sometimes I think this cycle never ends,

we start from top to bottom and we turn and climb again,

and it seems by the time I have figured what it's worth

the squeaking of our skin against the steel has gotten worse

Can't explain it

2008-09-23T11:48:00.002+08:00

I'm starting to feel funny. Everything's there but it doesn't make sense to me. My stomach's aching with nothingness. I had a night shift but could only sleep for 3 hours after. My head spins between worry and need to sleep, yet it's so awake. Sleeping on my ever-comfortable bed feels like sleeping on bricks. I don't feel like being in my own room now. i think im gonna be sick.

I wish I knew

2008-09-22T14:44:00.003+08:00

I slept dreaming of ice-cream galore but got up receiving a message that isn't as pleasant. I wish I knew what's going on. He's not replying, he's not picking up my calls. And I'm silently waiting here worrying my ass off wishing I could be there for him. I hope everything's okay, love.

Ben makes me want to

2008-09-21T01:21:00.009+08:00

Death Cab For Cutie - Bixby Canyon Bridge (live)

Because of Ben Gibbard, I'm a believer in sway. Swaying your body. ANd he probably swayed his way to thinness. He's the God of Sway when it comes to moving to the music. And it makes people want to sway as well it's awesome. And great voice. The music I always wake up to.

More SWAY from their performance in Singapore (pls ignore screaming fans).

andytanhw (Crooked Teeth) ariddesert87 (Title and Registration)

Stumble

2008-09-18T22:46:00.009+08:00

(photo credits: i think this is lily's)

And everything's okay again

2008-09-18T22:46:00.005+08:00

BRITNEY'S BACK!!!!!

This is a cause for celebration, it brings so much hope for the world. If Britney can come back from all that mess (with 3 VMA wins no less), then I say anything can. Go Brit!!!!

The Post-It Experiment

2008-09-14T20:54:00.001+08:00

To Infinity and maybe beyond

2008-09-11T23:35:00.002+08:00

Infinite Frameworks gig begins next week :) Of course, still as intern; logging and transcribing. But it's gonna be radical cos I'm not sure what to expect. Just that I have an interest in post-production, and its a post-production hse. So I'll be able to learn things plus get to know more people. The bonus is, there's going to be 14 interns.

Yep, definitely gonna be interesting.

Foo Fighters - My Hero

2008-09-11T02:10:00.000+08:00

Of camera, Jon & CJ7

2008-09-11T01:00:00.016+08:00

And sometimes there are bigger things than ourselves to attend to.

When I talk to Jon, it's usually an imaginative journey into Disneyland, which I love. I like asking about his day, seeing what he'll say. I like talking to him or showing him funny things that we both can laugh about. I like watching him observe something so intensely. Oh, children can be so inspiring.

I would also like to talk about my Canon Powershot A430. I don't think it's been in my possession for very long but it's been weird lately. Are there such things as cameras that gives auto Photoshop effects when you snap? I can't seem to take a proper picture unless I switch on the flash. Queer...

[The ISO was set to 100-200 cos it was broad daylight, but it gave this] Jon & I on a "treasure hunt" outdoors.

[And there's always the funny lines across the screen] Jon armed with fire.

[This is the best effect! That's how it came out and I'm so damn confused. I thought it came out nice anyway]

Named Baby & Mama by Jon.

Tasty slime by the Indons of the house.

Taken by Jon. It's a freaky doll. If you drop it it laughs its head off.

CJ7: "Am I dreaming....?"

Jon & CJ forever.

A Tin of Happiness

2008-09-07T23:49:00.004+08:00

Serene Saturday

2008-09-07T14:59:00.006+08:00

Sleeping in during the morning. Playing with the baby when awake. Taking a bath and get ready to meet a loved one. Can't help but smile. Don't forget the player that plays the soundtrack to your life and keeps your lonesome self company on the way.

Met. Heading down to Bugis, take a walk around Bugis Junction. Walk down to Arab Street. Oh bazaar bazaar! Amazing how food brings people together. Taking in the smells, the sights, the celebration of people being there with the same purpose.

FOOD, FOOD GALORE!

Nasi padang, to peanut pancakes, to kuih-muihs, beef and chicken kebabs, ramly burgers, hotdogs, fishballs, vadai, kurma, nasi briyani, air katira, air bandung, and MORE.

I used to hate crowds like these when younger. But now I kind of like it. Watching people moving, people queueing, people craning their necks to see whats on display, vendors moving at the speed of light to serve customers quick, children running around. To me it means, HARI RAYA IS COMING!!! And I'm not in it for the money even. It just seems like a nice festivity bringing people together.

So we bought kebabs, some kuihs, peanut pancakes, a bottle of Hershey kisses, air katira and water bottles, found a quiet, serene place to sit. Laid out the food nice and neatly and waited for azan.

Truth in waiting

2008-08-31T22:45:00.010+08:00

Sometimes I'm afraid I might one day forget what she sounded like, how she smiled, how she laughed, how she spoke, how she scolded us when she got back frm work, how she used to blow her nose like a trumpet every morn, the places she brought us to during spare time, the words she said...

People say I look like her but I don't see that at all. She was fair with a radiant glow which went well with her good-nature, that attracted me to her.

"No man or woman can be too powerful or too beautiful without disaster befalling." [King Phillip to young Alexander, Alexander the movie]

or "Nothing is (or can be) perfect."

or maybe even "Good things never last."

Life needs the ups and downs. Seems that's how it maintains its balance.

8 years gone, and she seems like another passing dream. Like I never met her, but the evidence is clear before my eyes when I look back at photographs. Everytime I have a memory of her, I plan to write it down.

"... our memories depend on a faulty camera in our minds" [DCFC What Sarah Said]

What Sarah said.

Love is watching someone die.

Death Cab For Cutie - What Sarah Said

What the world can't do without

2008-08-31T20:40:00.023+08:00

Marine life.

Meet Ray. I wonder what happened to his fin.

(The Hoosiers - 'Worried About Ray'?)

I forgot his name but it's beautiful in its own scary way.

That Japanese Spider crab.

Sea Dragon. It moves slowly and gracefully with the water. And its sensitive to light, the only one on display with 'No Flashes' sign. But some tourists never read.

The gelatinous beings with no heart.

(The Killers - I got Soul But I'm not a Soldier?)

3 lazy (or shy) sharks and a kepoh fish.

Dugong, he's cute in real life.

And the man we bumped into heehaw! Ghaz was doing an outdoor activity (sculpting) as part of his ADM class.

D'ohhhhhhhhh.

Stealing attention with their magnificence

2008-08-31T17:17:00.003+08:00

No eyes, no heart. Meowww.

d-d-Disco Era

2008-08-29T07:12:00.005+08:00

Find more videos like this on www.truveo.com.

What stood out most for me about the disco era were the - roller skates!

The clip is from a film called Roll Bounce. A group of neighbourhood boys go to their local rink to skate (and practically rule it) just about everyday till one day it closes from running out of business. Heading to the Sweetwater Roller Rink, they realise their modest talents are not enough.

The tricks and things in the show are wicked. But that's not why I wanna learn inline. Just that free willy feeling of cruising about. That is if I have (or can) learned doing it proper.

Another tribute to them d-d-Disco days! A song originally sung by McFadden & Whitehead - Ain't No Stopping Us Now.

Usher (Disco Ball 2003)

Michael turns 50

2008-08-29T06:18:00.004+08:00

Michael Jackson - Come Together (Beatles cover)

"Michael Jackson's 50th birthday, a milestone that will likely be feted bymany a newspaper in need of a holiday-weekend feature hole and a lot of morning-radio shows dredging up old jokes about plastic surgery and hyperbaric chambers. Thinking about Jackson hitting the big 5-0 has actually made me think about how the whole culture of celebrity has changed over the course of his fame... (etc.) " [idolator]

Think he still dances like he used to? Guess not. Maybe after he's died they'll saw off his feet and auction it off for 6 - 9 figure sum. Hmm talk about foot fetish. I still love you Michael!!!

And you know Pixar's done it again

2008-08-27T22:34:00.010+08:00

Pixar (short film) - One Man Band

I love you

2008-08-27T00:38:00.002+08:00

All of you. The polar bears in the Mandai Zoo, my family, my friends, boyfriend, best friends, Knut, Ah Meng (bless his/her soul), Mirzan, Ronald MacDonald, Steve Jobs, Jared Leto, Roseminah Ali, the dolphins in Japan (my love goes out to you), the trees and creatures of the Amazon, Retro Rocket, Backstreet Boys, Ruzanna Jamil, Michael Phelps, Li Jia Wei, John Lennon (bless his soul), and the rest of the world.

Sometimes you just need to cry a little, and everything is alright.

But nothing

2008-08-27T00:12:00.004+08:00

So much to say but memory sucks.

And sometimes I just like to wallow in misery and think everything in this world sucks. The thought I'm thinking these thoughts suck. I'm so optimistic I want to be pessimistic. Everything sucks. I'm saying all this cos I know it's not true. But that's me right now pessimist. Don't you just hate the world?

Why can't i be a better sister or friend or girlfriend? My own existence irks me. get away.

[deep inside she knows its all okay. there are people out there whom she loves very much and will do anything for and thinks they love her back]

this sucks. i have to get out of pessimist mode its not making me feel better.

[really deeeep down inside she's really happy and grateful about everything and everyone in her life an knows there's no need for all this blabbering]

i feel like i hold back my emotions alot of the time when im very mad. and it sucks that feeling. to want to think ur very madbut u cant say cos you either think all hell will break loose if the monster in you comes out, or, it might just make the monster in the other person come out. and its not gonna be rpettty.

people, let's stop any traces of judgmental-ism running in our blood. it's so inhumanely... sinful. it does no good for me, no good for you. no good to think what you think is really going through the minds of others or what they really go through. imagination is a powerful tool but use it wisely. like they always say, too much of something is never good.

neever.. ever.. eever... ever.. er.. r....

I spy my little eye on

2008-08-26T00:48:00.003+08:00

Really don't understand what some of the stuff means. But I want to learn inline skating more seriously now. Thanks to my first blading experience (and Lionel), and many bad falls, I started getting the hang of it being able to move on my own.

I want to practice and save up to purchase my first pair so I can leisurely blade around places. Something I wanted to do since I was little. And the dream comes true at 21 yay!

Where were our PSPs at 5?

2008-08-24T19:19:00.012+08:00

The story of a modern day 5-year-old who thinks it's absolutely normal to have every tech thing in the world at his age. He cares and he shares, but not when it comes to his tech things!

Hi, my name is Mimi. Recently Mama bought me a PSP. I'm very happy.

Boy: Hey ho what are you playing.

Mimi: A game, duh.

Boy: Let me see. I wanna play too.

Mimi: Bug off dizzle, you're in my wizzle.

Mimi: Pfffftttttttttt!!!

Tips here

2008-08-24T17:00:00.008+08:00

Need tips on graphic designing, weight loss, money management, great FYIs, DIYs or even having fun? Dumb Little Man is a great place to go.

Started by a man called Jay White who goes through the same problems as any human. While writing his experiences and their solutions he learned other people too had something to share and especially tips on facing different situations. So it became a place where people could chip in ideas and things they knew about diff. topics. It's a fun place to read stuff too.

Among its many splendid articles, here's one

15 Awesome Tutorial Websites You Probably Don't Know About

by Abhijeet Mukherjee, of Jeet Blog

The internet boasts of accommodating tutorials to absolutely anything. Here are 15 such super-useful sites which aim to provide you with all the tutorials you'd ever need.

How Stuff Works
How Stuff Works is probably the best known How-to tutorials site. It has has a vast and diverse collection with topics ranging from food, health, computers, etc. One of the best things about this site is that it explains even the toughest tutorial in a very simple and easy to understand language.

YouTube
Surprised? Well, it shouldn't be if you use YouTube a lot. Yesterday my younger brother bought a new guitar and the very first thing he needed to do was to tune it. So he just logged on, went to youtube.com and searched for "How to tune a guitar". And there you go! He had a nice video explaining the process step-by-step.

eHow
eHow is another comprehensive tutorials website with detailed instructions on how to do just about anything. Like How Stuff Works, this site also covers a wide range of topics.

About.com's Video Tutorials
About.com's video tutorial site has a collection of very informative how-to videos and screencasts on topics which include Parenting, Style, Electronics and Gadgets, etc. I found the collection to be very comprehensive and probably better than You Tube's collection of similar videos.

wikiHow
wikiHow, as it says, is an editable How-to site with 40,100 articles contributed by volunteers from different parts of the world. You're sure to find some nice tutorials here too.

Instructables
Instructables is a cool Do-It-Yourself site that has an extensive collection of user submitted how-to articles and easy instructions complete with videos and photographs. It's a community driven website where you can submit content, vote and comment on existing content.

Wired's How-To Wiki
Wired magazine's how-to wiki has some very elaborate and detailed tutorials focussed primarily on topics like Gadgets, Technology and Computers. You can also subscribe to its RSS feed to get them the new how-to articles directly in your feed reader.

PC World's How-to Site
PC World, one of the best tech journals available, also has a how to site that publishes technology focused tutorials related to various electronic gadgets, hardware and software applications.

VideoJug
When it comes to how-to video tutorial sites, VideoJug is probably the largest and most comprehensive. It has videos on varied subjects like choosing a new hairstyle, playing golf, installing windows or how to kiss someone passionately.

W3Schools
W3Schools is a first class web development tutorials website which provides easy reference guides on languages like HTML, XHTML, CSS, PHP and JavaScript. All the tutorials are free and nicely explained through various examples.

NETTUTS And PSDTUTS
NETTUTS and PSDTUTS are sister sites, in fact blogs, and definitely one of the best online resources on web development and Photoshop skills. NETTUTS explores web development and designing in detail while PSDTUTS provides some world-class Adobe Photoshop tutorials.

5min
5min is a video tutorial site with a difference- the videos are short and no more than 5 mins. Like other video sites, this too covers a wide range of topics, however it's yet to take on sites like VideoJug in the online video tutorial space.

SuTree
Sutree aggregates the best video tutorials from other video sites and covers a variety of topics like softwares, games, pets & animals etc. Like instructables, SuTree is also a community driven website and lets you find videos through tags and subscribe to the RSS feed of the site.

VTC
Although VTC is not entirely free to use, it does provide some nice tutorials on software and business applications. Out of around 66,000 tutorials, it provides 12,500 for free.

Good Tutorials
Good Tutorials has a nice collection of graphic design tutorials which it aggregates through various web design sites and blogs. And yes, it's free to use !

So overall, with the exception of VTC, all the other sites are completely free and can certainly fetch you any tutorial you can ever imagine. Hope you enjoy using them. :)

Cheers,

Abhijeet

[edit: 1 more contributed by Matt]

Monkey See

Monkey See was launched in January 2008, providing free access to a large collection of professionally-produced, high quality, how-to videos on a wide range of topics presented by experts. Tagline, See how the experts do it.

I miss you la

2008-08-24T16:59:00.000+08:00

Cos

2008-08-17T19:53:00.002+08:00

sometimes it can drive away your only source of comfort

that S word

2008-08-17T19:32:00.000+08:00

sometimes it sucks being so sensitive.

We love coffee generation!

2008-08-17T15:26:00.008+08:00

I absolutely love coffee. I know alot of people do. I have to have it almost every morning. The process of making it is as exciting as sipping it. Everyone does it a different way. I usually use the 3 in 1 packs cos I'm lazy and 3 in 1 packs are made for lazy people.

The excitement begins when I pull 2 golden sachets out of the bag, rip it open, and tilt it into the mug and watch as showers of golden brown and white powder reach the bottom.

I take the thermos and pour in hot water slowly watching as the powder transform into a milky brown brew, steam rises, and aroma fills the nostrils. Mmmm mmm.

I take a spoon and mix the brew in slow circles, listening to the soft tinkle as metal meets glass. Then take a sip. You know it's a perfect morning.

Is coffee really a cup of heaven? Or a cup full of diseases waiting to attack?

Some reading material:

Inkling: Coffee - Friend or Foe?
Dumb Little Man: The Pros and Cons of Coffee Drinking

Roisin Murphy - The Closing of the Doors

2008-08-14T22:08:00.001+08:00

Kampong Jared

2008-08-14T04:06:00.004+08:00

Habitat for Humanity - Malaysia 06/08/08

with pakciks and makciks

Death Cab For Cutie in town!

2008-08-13T00:55:00.000+08:00

[photo: Nikki Ormerod]

We got top seats at the Concert Hall of the Esplanade. And I do mean all the way at the top on the 4th level (but it's okay cos I didn't pay for the tix. oops! :X). There was this exciting atmosphere surrounding us as everyone started getting into a chatter abt when the band would be out, looking at the DCFC shirt they just purchased, what songs they might sing.

A single ppurple spotlight shone onto the stage illuminating the instruments. Soon darkness fell and everyone screamed. Even me! When I didn't know what was happening at all.

They have arrived!

"Thanks for coming... we didn't think anyone would come at all."

From where we were sitting, the band almost looked like ants. But their presence on stage and the music blaring in the ears was enough to remind us that they were playing a helluva show.

Got to love the way Ben moves. It was like a half shuffle, half sway. He's lost a good amount of weight too. He used to be plumper. Turns out he's vegan and things now. Good for him.

Overall it was a great show, great time, great music, great company. That's all that matters.

PA PAAAA, THIS IS THE SOUND OF SETTLING, PA PAAAA PA PAAAAAA

Good day

2008-08-11T13:38:00.000+08:00

Angels and Airwaves - Good Day

Girl of my dream

2008-08-11T07:26:00.000+08:00

You know in dreams when you sense something good or bad is gonna happen when you see someone or something and they really turn out that way.

I was in a car in a carpark (with someone mysterious as the driver). I just entered the car, am about to close the door. Suddenly a girl appears next to my door and she doesn't let me close it.

For a moment I'm thinking she's a spirit who's ready to eat me. Then I think she's a robber who's gonna rob me.

I get out of the car.

We stand face-to-face and she looks a little scary from my 'current' knowledge of her being a robber. But suddenly I thought of her being a lonely, love-starved girl and maybe that's why she's been trying to get my attention.

I wrapped my arms tight around her, she just fell limp into me and cried away.

SO FUCKED

2008-08-11T00:00:00.000+08:00

dude i'm so effing pissed now.. so many things but i don't know what.. fr once you dont wanna hold it in again but just throw that fist on the wall

Pre-Nat day gig

2008-08-09T01:03:00.000+08:00

In our group of "backstage" people, there were only 4 of us. I was nervous at first cos I've never gone to like a 2-day work gig on my own before. I had to start somewhen anyway. But things went great. It started with a pretty mundane but turned out okay job of ensuring all the wrist lights, which will go in the goodie bag, work. Macham factory workers, some unpacked, some checked, some repacked.

What we were doing isn't the main Nat day that would be happening at the floating platform. Ours was one of those "heartlands" Nat day events where random Nat day shows were ran in different parts of SG. So ours was at the "sinking Padang" courtesy of Young Ntuc. We managed to catch the rehearsals which I have to say was pweety good. Since it was under young ntuc, the dancers were young like teenagers and mostly malays. And two girls caught my eye. Their dancing wasn't like super spectacular but I just liked the way they moved and everytime they started moving to the beat I had to watch.

It just felt like a nice moment to share with a friend. We're out in the open, with sooo much space around you, it's starting to darken but stage lights illuminate the place a little here and there, the sky looks superb, the buildings glow, and a soft breeze accompanies. I didn't care if it was for Nat day or not. It justfelt nice.

Uniform for the day [9/8/08] is a lime green tee! if only it was glow in the dark that would be fun.

Them good 'ol English sayings

2008-08-07T01:51:00.000+08:00

When I was 14, I thought English proverbs and idioms were only phrases I could use to help me ace my English Language exams. And I did with proper usage of it in my compositions.

Now, I depend on them almost everyday to keep me in the righter path and the righter state of mind. Of course not blindly, but if there's logic to it there's no harm in believing in it. Especially if it makes you feel better after a difficult situation.

What I like about it is there are so many different sayings that cater to different situations. It feels like every saying has a special purpose depending on how people view it and use it. But what's fun about it is when you're in a certain situation, and somebody says a saying thats very closely-related to the situation they are/have been/going to be in, then suddenly the group feels this great uplift of enlightenment. And I think that's the magic of proverbs, that moment of enlightenment.

So I thought I'd share some here once in a while and hopefully help others get through their day as well.

(note: the proverb meanings may not exactly agree with your prior knowledge and what you know it to be, but the ones here are based on a tiny bit research, prior knowledge, my thoughts, and a tinier bit of logic)

Proverbs of the day:

Each day brings its own bread

Try not to worry so much about the future

[perhaps it also suggests enjoying the company of that 'bread' while you have it cos when a different day comes, its a whole different one]

After a storm comes a calm

Things cannot stay in turmoil forever, calmer times will always follow

Have a good day ahead.

Karen & Jared - MTV Asia Awards 2008 interview

2008-08-07T01:36:00.000+08:00

Dion & Streisand

2008-07-31T17:59:00.000+08:00

I remember my mum was next to me when I first saw the MV for Celine Dion and Barbara Streisand's Tell Him.

I loved it when I first heard it. It was so powerful for me, when these 2 women joined voices. All that passion when they sang, and somehow it still sounded like a sad song. I still listen to it so I keep it in my mp3 player. It just brings this uplifting feeling when I hear it. And I'm brought back to the 90s, sitting in the Bishan living room with mum beside me as we enjoyed the company of these women on one of those nice afternoons.

Celine Dion & Barbara Streisand - Tell Him

12 August

2008-07-31T01:31:00.000+08:00

WHO'S GOING FOR DEATH CAB?

WE IS!

Death Cab For Cutie

2008-07-31T00:49:00.000+08:00

Death Cab For Cutie - I Will Follow You Into The Dark

I think i sinned

2008-07-31T00:35:00.000+08:00

Is it bad when you suddenly talk to your baby brother as if he's an adult and expect him to understand like an adult, and when he didn't and threw a tantrum you're caught off guard cos he's just five and you forgot it and you go all road rage and start babbling things you're not even aware of. I think it is bad. Damn i have to stop all this expecting. Expectations expectations. Don't do that, you limit people you hurt people. When will i ever learn.

Biore pore pack is best. If you got uber zealous blackheads studding your face and you want to get rid of them get a pore pack! 10 mins and zoot, its the best feeling when you remove it! You get a clean face with holes.

Purchase of the day

2008-07-29T19:54:00.000+08:00

I went down to purchase one of them good tasting Nutellas but oh Nutella, Nutella, where have ye gone? Why did you hide when I was so in need of your good tasting fillings. So craving for that smooth, heavenly, out of this world chocolate.

You weren't there. So I purchased a Nova coffee pack instead. But have no fear Nutella, I still love you.

Power of opposites

2008-07-28T15:42:00.000+08:00

But there's also that tingle in your tummy when you're uncertain. Fear, maybe. Or excitement. Ready to see how it turns out, like an experiment.

When opposites meet, whether siblings, friends, love partners, or colleagues, either disaster or magic could happen. If they possess two completely different characteristics from different extremes. It's contingent on the person's background, how the person grew up, the type of people that surround him, what his family's like, who he hangs with, the person's current well-being, how he views life, how he reacts to different people and situations, etc.

When you put two humans together you never know what can happen. And that's what's exciting about it. Because these humans can move on their own. And who knows which way they'll move towards.

So it's up to us to either make that 1 + 1 = 1 seamless whole, where differences are expressed and shared, where we hold the ying and the other holds the yang that helps to keep both stable and balanced, where we could use the differences to fill in the 'gaps' of the other, discover things about yourself or the other person you never knew; or continue making 1 + 1 = 2 separate entities where the differences will never be resolved, and both ignores each other's skills/flaws, and thus, they shall never rest in peace.

MAA 2 August 08

2008-07-28T15:27:00.000+08:00

MTV ASIA AWARDS 2008

This weekend, Saturday, 2 August

11 pm

showtimes:

Sunday, August 3, 11am and 8pm
Monday, August 4, 7.30am
Tuesday, August 5, 1.30pm
Wednesday, August 6, 11.00pm
Friday, August 8, 10.00am
Saturday, August 9, 2.30pm
Wednesday, August 13, 11.30pm
Thursday, August 14, 6am
Friday, August 15, 6.30pm
Sunday, August 17, 7.30am
Monday, August 18, 11.30pm
Sunday, August 24, 10.00pm

Ignite

2008-07-28T15:24:00.000+08:00

Was quite rad, there was crowd, responsive RP crowd. Which was cool. Nice atmosphere. They should have more events like these in RP.

30Y

2008-07-27T00:32:00.000+08:00

I have to get my hands on that yearbook... must... must... must.

1 + 1 = 1

2008-07-23T15:31:00.000+08:00

I was watching Oprah at 5 am today.

So there was this story of an 8-year-old Indian girl, let's name her Rani, in the 1960s who was taken away from her family because they were poor. A lady came to her and told her everything will be alright, she will bring her to a safer place. Next thing she knew she was being sold as a slave. She was constantly beaten, and almost sold into prostitution. Somehow someway, she got lucky. She was brought to America where a lady adopted her and gave her everything she needed to heal.

Nearby in Vietnam, a 9-year-old boy, Tron, too had to leave his family. It was wartime and they were taking away boys as young as 8 and 9 to be recruits in the war. His family didn't want that to happen to him. So they sent him off saying he's going over to his granny's and they would come visit soon. He aboarded a ship full of refugees without any relatives with him. Along the way they were founded by an enemy ship. He watched as people were shot in front of him, mothers being raped as their babies were taken away from them.

The ship reached a deserted island of Indonesia. He stayed in a cave for 6 months by himself until he was found by Indonesians, and sent to America.

It was there that Tron met Rani (on a blind date), and today, they're married with 4 kids.

If you can Dream it, they can Ice Cream it!

2008-07-23T14:53:00.000+08:00

COLD ROCK ICE CREAMERY

Lionel introduced us the place cos he heard it on radio. If you have a couple of friends with you, looking for a haunt to sit, talk, and eat ICE CREAM ALL DAY. Then this is the place to go. Interestingly, Singapore only has one outlet down at Holland Village.

What's special about the place is you get to pick 2 ice-cream flavours of your choice, and as many toppings as you want ranging from gummi bears, marshmallows, snicker bars, oreo cookies, MnMs, Freddo the frog, biscuits, etc. They will then bring it over to their 'cold rock' table, which prevents the ice-cream from melting, where they will mix and mash everything together. It's a really fun experience.

A video demo-ing how they do it at COLD ROCK:

Mmmm mm.

Itchy fingers

2008-07-23T13:37:00.000+08:00

Fingers feeling itchy for designing? Better still, great rewards await!!!

Some fun-ish competitions.

1. Baybeats 2008 - Silkscreen Design Challenge

2. Allmightys

3. Teetonic

4. Split the atom

1. Baybeats 2008 http://www.baybeats.com.sg/

Design a quirky character that rep. Baybeats 08. 10 designs will be selected and of these 10, public will vote for the best. The winning design will make it to the silkscreen counter where everyone can transfer the design on anything printable. (deadline: 25 July 08, oops this Fri!)

2. Allmightys http://allmightys.com/features/index.htm

Holds frequent design competitions following themes. Designs will be put up for voting. Winning designs are printed on tees and put up for sale. Artists earn commission from sales.

Current theme: "Future-Past-Perfect"

Description: "... Refers to a time that is in the future, relative to another point in the past, but is in the past relative to a point in its future." (deadline: 25 August 08)

3. Teetonic http://www.teetonic.com

The non-stop t-shirt design competition. No theme, no deadlines. Submit whenever you want about whatever you want. Designs are put up for public vote. Winners get 100 pounds.

4. Split the atom http://www.splittheatom.com/designashirt/index.asp

The neverending T-shirt design comp. Design of any genre and theme for printing on T-shirts. Winner gets 250 pounds.

Battle of One

2008-07-15T00:45:00.000+08:00

"Be a hero, kill your ego"

Just something to share. In recent weeks, I've been thinking a lot more. This extra voice in the head. It used to be so excessive I simply couldn't control it at all. Now it's back but more controllable. I can tell it to shut up once in a while.

It's not a completely bad thing, this voice, and neither is it completely good. The thing about my sensitivity is that the slightest things make me think throughout the day and even into my sleep. From the slightest things to biggest things worry me. Whether it's about my dad, my baby brother, my best friend, my boyfriend, my ex-, my sec sch friends, my ex-facis, my sec sch best friend, my kindergarten friends, my future, etc.

It's tiring but it can't stop.

I'd wake up with headaches and a thousand images flashing in my head at an instant (eh, is that why my headaches often?). But good thing about all the thinking is, it helps me improve myself if I think I haven't been acting fairly to people. I rewind and replay several times before deciding to change. Change is constant, and so is learning.

But lately. All these thoughts flooding my head. Some so redundant, some just replaying. It's become so used to thinking it's starting to generate on its own. So much so that I'm oblivious of where I'm physically standing, who I'm physically sitting next to, what my ears are realistically hearing, and what my hands are physically touching. Because I'm so caught up in thoughts.

Frequently I tell myself, stop it! You have to concentrate on the NOW.

The more my mind went to the past and the future, I realised I became more expectant of people and situations, more arrogant, more selfish, more hot-headed, more judgmental.

I would get mad at myself because of these things and not really understand why. It wasn't easy but it took me weeks to understand a little better.

I've told this to myself many many times before but didn't completely adopt it - Hindsight is often a blessing.

So I said - Concentrate on the now, don't expect too much of the future. Cos if you do, you will not see the Value of yourself/people/things/situations/etc. Be aware of your surroundings - sight, sound, smell, touch, taste. Appreciate the people around you, appreciate the things you currently have, appreciate reality. Take things in as they come.

So I'm a fan of subtitles no more (unless it's a foreign flick).

"Love is the only rational act" - Levine

That's what I'll do. Learn to love everyone/thing. At the end of the day when you have problems, it comes down to a bit of loving and it's all okay.

-----------------------------
"It is said in martial arts that, you must slice your ego first before slicing the opponent's head."

[for quick read, 'ctrl F' the words "ego" and "now"]

"Kill your ego, recognize the true you"

Loud music makes my bowels move

2008-07-08T14:26:00.000+08:00

I have purchased 'Michael Jackson Live: The Dangerous Tour' DVD. It's a damn good feeling watching Michael again in clear quality. One day I'm going to share this with my children. And they'll look back on it like how we looked back at The Beatles, and hopefully embrace his music as well. He was one of the best thing that happened to my 90s.

Here is a great song to look back on. Get lost in the music.

Michael Jackson - Will You Be There

Hold me like the River Jordan and I will then say to thee, you are my friend

carry me like you are my brother, love me like a mother, will you be there?

weary, tell me will You hold me, when wrong will you scold me, when lost will you find me?

But they told me a man should be faithful, and walk when not able, and fight till the end
But I'm Only Human

Everyone's taking control of me, seems that the world's got a role for me
I'm so confused will you show to me you'll be there for me and care enough to bear me

Hold Me, Lay Your Head Lowly, Softly Then Boldly, Carry Me There
Lead Me, Love Me And Feed Me, Kiss Me And Free Me, I Will Feel Blessed
Carry, Carry Me Boldly, Lift Me Up Slowly, Carry Me There
Save Me, Heal Me And Bathe Me, Softly You Say To Me, I Will Be There

Lift Me, Lift Me Up Slowly, Carry Me Boldly, Show Me You Care
Hold Me, Lay Your Head Lowly, Softly Then Boldly, Carry Me There
Need Me, Love Me And Feed Me, Kiss Me And Free Me, I Will Feel Blessed

In Our Darkest Hour, In My Deepest Despair, Will You Still Care? Will You Be There?
In My Trials And My Tribulations, Through Our Doubts And Frustrations
In My Violence, In My Turbulence, Through My Fear And My Confessions
In My Anguish And My Pain, Through My Joy And My Sorrow
In The Promise Of Another Tomorrow
I'll Never Let You Part, For You're Always In My Heart.

Treasuring the finds

2008-07-03T23:44:00.000+08:00

Today was PHASE 3 of 'Operation Clean This Nasty Room'. Which will be the final phase, I believe. Originally, it was like this mixed-up complexedly-composed song. Then, it was stripped to its bare minimum of just voice and acoustic. And thats what I've done. Stripped my room silly.

I have to say it's been fun. Cleaning and organizing can be a real sucker when you suddenly realise you have tons of shit in the room. But the fun part is trying to come up with categories, re-organizing and abit of redesigning where the things have to go. The bonus is, almost every item brings back a certain memory, which slows down the process. But hey! All in the name of fun and reminisce.

I have organized the junkyard into:

1. (Sec) School-related

Things like textbooks, notebooks, excercise books, assessment books. I want to keep them just in case I get bored one day. And I have a hunch that I may feel like re-educating myself sometime in the future. Or perhaps look back at my books and go, awww I hated this chapter. You know, it's like precious memories I want to keep.

So throwing of textbooks is no go. They're here for keeps. And they'll probably go into my future fantasy library.

2. Magazine/Comic

For memories sake too I guess. Magazines from as far back as 1997 [the pop era manz!] like Lime (when it was superb), Teens, Teenage, Bop, 8 Days, Tiger Beat, Smash Hits, It's Hot!, Top of The Pops, etc. It would always remind me of my high school days where splurging on a magazine once/twice a week was a necessity. It was irresistible. Every week, there was someone interesting on the covers. Now, not so much.

3. Photo albums

Very important.

4. Spare

Mainly consisting of past incompletely utilised exercise books, papers, files, etc. for future use.

5. Gadgets

A drawer full of chargers, product packages, warranty cards, receipts, external hard disks, etc.

6. Important things/Religious books

This one's a pretty big drawer so there's room for one more category of things. Things like diploma certs, O level certs, death certs, religious books, all go in here.

7. Precious things

Given by precious people, belongs in this drawer.

8. Books

Yay for fiction, non-fiction, thriller, suspense, and fantasy!

9. CDs/DVDs

Gelora! I love staring at entertainment. and knowing a lot of stories await me, exciting.

10. Misc.

Old toys, accessories, board games, watches, pouches, insert here.

The room breathes new life again.

Re-wound

2008-07-03T01:10:00.000+08:00

Such a nice time for reminiscing. Remember

THE OSMONDS

I loved watching Donny & Marie (the 90s one). They always had new stuff on the show. I remembered Donny introducing medicine for kids that was made into a lollipop so kids would eat it. That was interesting. It was from there I started learning more about them and their songs. Aaron Carter did a cover for 'One Bad Apple', and S Club Juniors did a cover for 'Puppy Love'.

Here is they performing their best energetic moves in One Bad Apple. It's really good. That little kid is Donny btw. Gerekz!

One Bad Apple

MICHAEL JACKSON

King of Pop or what. What would the Pop era be without him? Probably different but we don't know. I'm just happy he was a part of my childhood. The "HO!"s and the "Hi heeee!"s. Who can resist.

Here's a great performance I found online, done during his History world tour in 97. It would probably bring back some memories if you watch. It's called They Don't Care About Us.

They Don't Care About Us

THE HANSONS

My family haven't really subscribed to cable yet in the 90s. But there was a short period of time when I think we got free previews of cable channels. And I got excited everytime I saw Aaron Carter or Hanson, Nsync or BSB on MTV. I remembered always seeing "I Will Come To You" by Hanson appear on. I love the song so much, I still do. The brothers were great songwriters at such a young age it's impressive.

So here we go, I Will Come To You with The Hansons.

I Will Come To You

it's not fair...

2008-07-02T14:29:00.000+08:00

i'm 21.. not 12. i've never asked for anything why are you still keeping me in this shell..

Say my name

2008-06-18T15:31:00.000+08:00

Haha I was bored. really.

If you're bored too you can do it here.

They lied. They said "have your favourite celebs spell out your name".

None of them 're my fave. Where's my host!

Tegan and Sara

2008-06-17T13:34:00.000+08:00

Tegan Rain Quin and Sara Kiersten Quin -

Twins, born September 19 1980, raised in Canada, and darn good.

Tegan and Sara - The Con
Tegan and Sara - I Was Married

TEGAN AND SARA_the con_live

Lennon's kid

2008-06-17T11:16:00.001+08:00

All along I thought Lennon only had one kid, Sean [right], whose mother is Yoko Ono n who was five when his father died. But while watching an interview there's another kid from a first wife, Cynthia. His name is John Charles Julian Lennon [left], also known as Julian Lennon.

What many people didn't know is there were a few Beatle songs written for/inspired by him.

"Lucy In The Sky With Diamonds"

Julian inspired the title of one of his father's most famous songs whose lyrics described a picture Julian drew; a watercolour painting of a girl [a classmate named Lucy] surrounded by stars.

"Hey Jude"

Paul McCartney was inspired with 'Hey Jude' when Julian's parents divorced. It was meant to be 'Hey Jules' but McCartney changed it to Jude cos it sounded better.

Paul: What happened with "Hey Jude" was I was driving out to see Cynthia and Julian and they - Cyn and John - had just been separated and they were still friends you know. You know people involved in divorces - both sides are still your friends, you can't go siding with just one. So... I went out just to see Cyn and to see how she was, to see how things were. I was just driving out one day. It was a lovely day. And I find in the car for me - that's a good time to kind of get ideas and stuff, I think it is for a lot of people. So I was just going out there and was singing "Hey Jules" - (sings "Hey Jules") - I got this idea - (sings "Don't make it bad") - you know the situation - (sings "take a sad song and make it better") and - Eventually I thought "Jules" didn't sound quit right and "Jude" just stuck, a little break on it. It just sounded better in the lyrics. So I substituted that word. But I didn't actually go up to Julian and - "Hey you know I wrote this for you" - I don't do that. But that was really the basic idea that kicked it off.

"Good Night"

A track from The Beatle's White Album, although sung by Ringo Starr, is a lullaby written by John Lennon for Julian.

THE BEATLES_lucy in the sky with diamonds

Hindsight

2008-06-13T22:50:00.000+08:00

One of the best and worst days of my 20-year life. A part of me felt a certain loss while another was scheming a plan in order to improve herself. One part felt hopeless while another knew exactly what was happening and what must be done.

I am calm. It took a bit of darkness for me to see the light. Literally when I was lying down on my bed, headphones on, staring into the dark, everything came to me. The answers were sitting there staring at me the entire time but I kept overlooking them. It was so hard to focus today. A thousand thoughts running through my head.

I know what to do now. It was just coincidence all this had to happen on Friday 13. But I'm glad it's over.

Saturday

2008-06-12T17:19:00.000+08:00

Mirzan will be back in two days (:

But that means I have to get used to a noisy lifestyle again, and less alone times ):

We can work it out!

I met up with Graham yesterday. Starting July-Aug I'll be working with him and his friends/partners for about 8 months. In a way, it's exciting. But in another, it's scary. The same way we feel everytime we begin something new. But it's undeniable. How nervous we get when we know we're working with professionals, and how we might not be able to meet their expectations and things.

Ever since I left STA, life has been such a thrilling rollercoaster. SO full of uncertainties, possibilities, mistakes, excitement all rolled into one. 2008 has become/is becoming my experimental year. I'm just a wandering soul who walks around aimlessly bumping into opportunities and taking them. I want to try new things.

The company Graham is in sounded pretty cool. I'll be doing most of the admin shit and supporting the Project Manager but at least I'll get to learn along the way and work my way up. They work internationally too so if I'm lucky I get to travel. One of the coolest things is they're gonna bring in holographic technology from London I think. It's been done before for Gorillaz's performance back in the 2003 MTV Awards where they were holograph-ed on stage.

Okay I'm off to watch Kungfu Panda now.

I tried

2008-06-12T12:20:00.001+08:00

1 down.

woah

2008-06-11T01:38:00.000+08:00

... that was weird. reading my first blog again.

I saw a white limping man

2008-06-10T22:40:00.000+08:00

He looked a little into his 60s, mid-built, a little hunched, with a black bag slung on his right shoulder, and two bags of heavy grocery bags. It was that sheltered pathway to Somerset MRT, I was on my way home and walking behind this poor soul who looked like he was forcing his legs to move.

I looked down. Because I will not be caught staring at this poor man like he's some awkward outsider. I'll just look down and keep on walking but I will not overtake him. And somehow deep inside I wished he would just disappear. Not that I had a grudge against him. But I was hoping he was just a figment of my imagination.

I respect this man. He reminded me of my grandfather. Even though he didn't know, I felt like I just couldn't overtake him like that. For me, that would mean I don't care so much for him and have given up on him. I wanted to give him some invisible support and so, continued walking behind him until we parted ways at the MRT gate.

Song of the day:

The Beatles - Hello, Goodbye

Sound escape

2008-06-09T22:24:00.000+08:00

THE BEATLES_all you need is love

December 8, 1980

2008-06-05T00:15:00.000+08:00

I was watching a film on a psychopath who killed an icon, John Lennon.

The first thing you want to know is all that stuff about my dad, and what he did to my mum and me... the whole goddamn childhood. But I'm not gonna tell you any of that stuff. That stuff isn't important... not anymore. - one of the first lines of Mark Chapman, the man who was 25 at the time, who killed Lennon

I love reading or watching shows on psychopaths n criminals n murderers n schizophrenics. Cos at the end of it all, you feel such a great deal of understanding for why they are like that, why they killed that guy or why he has a compulsive behaviour. And it always starts with problems they had since young [which is why I say proper child development is v. impt]. And it's not like special problems just because they commit crimes. It's common problems, like the ones you and I have/had.

It makes you think and when you put yourself in their shoes, you'd sometimes go

I would have done the same thing.

As for Mark Chapman, his b/g in a summary goes like this

Unhappy childhood

Violent parents

NO friends

was picked on all the time

kids called him "pussy"

No one to Love/who Loves him

No one who really cared to

sit and listen to him

Who wouldn't go cuckoo.

And when you have all of the above factors, you realize that you intensively talk to yourself cos nobody cares abt you so the only friend you have is yourself and the Little People in your head. And you start making things up, which you believe in. Eventually you don't know what you're doing in this world cos hell no one cares about your existence, and you start hearing voices in your head asking you to do things. Somehow you follow what the voices tell you to do. You get caught up in all the confusion you don't even know what's happening anymore. Next thing you know, John Lennon is bleeding to death at your feet, fans are wailing, officers are cursing, everyone's looking at you, and in your hand is a revolver.

School boys

2008-06-04T04:57:00.000+08:00

Got a little bored at 2am. I started thinking of mijon again.

the kid in the image can be a boy, girl, me, you.

Really, don't get forget to catch Sayang Sayang tonight if you've got nothing to do.

I'm gonna record the whole season.

I'm a blu, I'm a dee da ba da, I'm a dee da ba da, I'm a dee da ba da...

MARILAH KITA!*

2008-06-03T16:31:00.000+08:00

[translated * LET'S!]

DUDES, DUDETTES, HOMOS AND SAPIENS!

MARILAH KITA* GO BLADINGZZZ

For the love of God, Fun, and Good Company!

At least before Adam and Garf goes into camp and shave them heads bald. Before June 16! :D:D

MAA Malaysia 2008

2008-06-03T02:39:00.000+08:00

The news is out! It has been announced!

MTV Asia Awards 2008 will be held on August 2 at Genting - City of Entertainment.

And the host will be none other than *drum ber-rolling*

JARED LETO

I am surprised, very surprised. Of all people, how did he get involved. Yes I have to go. It will be stupid if this is the closest I'll be to the frontman of my fav band, and I don't go for it. I'll be 21 by then. Daddy dearest has to let me go. Damn, they're so close they might as well come to Singapore *silently prays* ... more about MTV Asia Awards 2008

Something to end the night.

30 SECONDS TO MARS_the kill_live_chainsaw awards

It's time for Sayang Sayang la!

2008-06-01T20:09:00.001+08:00

photo credits to The Straits Chinese House, Domestic Life and Traditions

An article on MediaCorp's Buzz section today featuring Kheng Hua and John Lee:

In the upcoming Ch 5 comedy Sayang Sayang, Tan Kheng Hua dons a tight kebaya, a tight bun (on the headlah), red lips and barks orders in Malay and Chinese easily.

She could only be playing a Peranakan matriarch. Sayang Sayang tells the story of the Tan family, a Peranakan family with a soft-spoken dad (John Lee), an overly anxious and controlling first wife (Kheng Hua), a sneaky second wife (Lok Meng Chue), and a dreamboat of a son (Johnny Lu), who also happens to be bringing a tomboyish pork seller (Michelle Chong) into the family.

To be sure, the synopsis promises a lot of family drama (lies! backstabbing!) but we think it’s the whole Peranakan aspect that’s going to really get you tickled.

It’s fitting then that the Tan family is headed in real life by one person who actually is Peranakan (John) and another who says she’s spent her whole life surrounded by Peranakans (Kheng Hua)...read more!

It's exciting to think the show's airing soon. Sometimes when I look back, I miss having a good chat with the crew, or the makcik of the Mountbatten house, the talents, Uncle Yeo [van driver. "Uncre Yeo! Ni hao ma!"]. Amazing. Break times were usually the fun times. Everyone sits together and have a good chat and eatz wonderful food.

But of course, rough days. When you wish you could just run away from everything. The first few weeks on set, I stuck close to the makcik cos she made me feel 'at home'. She was what kept me sane on set.

I remembered the mornings dad would send me to office at 5 am and I dreaded getting out of the car. At the office doorstep, I would just watch as dad drove away.

Anyhow! Those days are over. The now is, show is airing soon. If you're lucky, you can spot the interns ;) As maids, passers-by, students, whatever!

So dudes/dudettes, if you're free and am bored on Wednesday night (4 June), watch

SAYANG SAYANG

WED 4 JUNE

CH 5, 8PM

Okay, goodnight!