Saya minta maaf

* I apologize

for being so judgmental, for doubting, for denying, for being careless, for procrastinating, for ignoring. sometimes we do some things to escape only to find ourselves sucked back in to a bigger trap.

Clown

According to Cambridge Dictionaries,

priority - something that is very important and must be dealt with before other things

and

balance - to give several things equal amounts of importance, time or money so that a situation is successful

In a matter of 24 hours, i made different groups of people upset due to priority. or my failure to prioritise. 

1. colleague

we had a party at a colleague's house last night. due to some circumstances, i left the party early. i did feel guilty. cos it was the last time we'll see some of the crew. but i wanted to go meet him as well. the next day, a friend said

"... eh yesterday some of them mad at you. asked how come you suddenly leave. some of them looking for you..."

2. mr f

i cancelled out on an outing with him at the very last minute today cos i felt bad about leaving the party early the previous night. so i decided to spend today with my colleagues. but i feel awful at the same time for canceling out on him so late.

3. mirzan

i thought i would reach home by 7pm so i called mirzan to tell him. he looked forward to me coming home by 7. but alas, i got back at 9pm. he was still happy to see me. and said, "i want to play hide and seek. you know how to play hide and seek?" "no i don't. later teach me okay." i went in to change, answered a few sms-es. he shouted outside my room "kakak, faster!" i was still sms-ing. i came back out, and found him soundly asleep in his bed :( 

my bibik looked at me and said, "he so poor thing. he went back and forth, back and forth waiting for you but you didn't come out." 

my heart sank. i feel like the lousiest sister :(:(

4. dad

this occurred many times before but i've always been lacklustre about it. everytime i keep my phone in my bag when i go out. so if anyone calls i don't know cos it's on vibration mode. when i open my phone, there's always tons of missed calls by my dad. today when i almost reached home i had 3 missed calls by him.

dad "where r u?"

nat "admiralty mrt"

dad "ok, bibik waiting for u at home since 7pm"

nat "i had some packing to do. i just said 7pm in case i went back early"

dad "i call u always didn't answer. next time if i m dieing i will have difficulty to let u know"

i remembered not being able to concentrate on a single thing the entire day today. if it wasn't one, it was the other. 

lessons:

- to keep promises

- to never be last minute about informing

- to always keep phone with me

- to be smarter at prioritising

- to spend more time with mirzan and family after internship

- to remember lessons learned

"Life is like riding a bicycle. To keep your balance you must keep moving." - Albert Einstein

I am the proud owner of

30 SECONDS TO MARS self-titled album YAY!

What did you say, Zu Wee?

"IT'S A WRAPPPP!!!"  

I knew it, I knew all that hard work would pay off. Sayang Sayang wrapped on 20 April 2008. Just a bit of endurance, sacrifice and willpower is all it takes... to make the wrap seem so much more worthwhile. It has been great, it has been exceptionally fabulous. I am proud to have been a part of this production, I am proud to have met the people I met, and learned from them along the journey. I am happy (and a tiny bit exhausted).

Like Jia Min (2nd AD) said,

"You guys survived.."

It does feel weird knowing it has ended. Now we have to re-work our lifestyle. There's going to be lesser chaos. For now. 

Apparently we found out work doesn't end here. We have to tear down everything from set, pack the place, clean up the mess, and see if they need anymore help before permanently saying bye bye at the end of April. 

This production has ended, but it might spell the beginning of another. Possibly,

... with a group that's doing a cina peranakan drama, who only need help in photoshopping

... with Richard! The nicest baba man we know, who needs help in t-shirt designing in conjunction w/ the peranakan museum opening 

"Thrilling man!" - Jia Min

I am the proud owner of

The OC Season 1

The OC Season 2

Sound escape

ARCADE FIRE
again cos I love watching them play live.



















Arcade Fire - Rebellion (lies) (live on Letterman)

Plugless

Firstly,


HAPPY 21ST BIRTHDAY MR ONG IRFAN
I wish I could've been at the party as well, even tho it was a surprise one
But many wishes to you and Lyn, Ong Schlong :D

---------------------

It's been confirmed, 20th April - "it's a wrap!"

I can't wait to lead a normal life again, but there's a lot of things I'll miss. Preparing props, rushing to locations, talking and working with the crew, watching the cast get made up, relaxing with the interns, the rush of scene change, the last min orders by ADs, angsty directors, watching the cast get into character, getting last min orders to be extras (jannah's gonna be on tv!), and looking forward to meal times (and we can't do this without jannah :D)!

Everyone looks forward to meal times. at 12 am, when talents are feeling sleepy, they look for Jannah because she's the answer to their need to rejuvenate. kheng hua looks for jannah for her daily kopi-o kosong, michelle chong looks for jannah for her teh-o.

Honestly girl, no one can stay alive without you on the set. Props are props, anyone can do it (and it's not all that fun either, trust me). But no one can handle the food like jannah, the effort and love she puts into it.. cos it is not easy pleasing everyone. but jenny always knows what we peoples likes :)

Hmm the train this morning was jam-packed as hell. But I think I like the idea of being squashed. It means I don't have to hold the railing. If the train jerks, I just lean on someone so it's kind of cosy.

So today I'm doing transcribing! Really excited!

So many plans for post 20th April.

I've bought OC season 1 and 2, and coming up 3 so I can have my own drama marathon.
gonna clean up my room,
start watching more movies,
walk around Singapore,
pay attention to Mirzan,
start making t-shirts for the fun of it cos I don't want to buy anymore,
go ben & jerry's with my lovers,
do a series of masak-masak show (don't forget jan!)
purchase more dvds
and have the time of my life!

then I'll find work again. Hope you guys are doing well too!

Onboard the Intern Ship

I have to say, 2 months of internship feels like 20 years. My social life lacks colour. It gave us nightmares for a week, lack of sleep, we faced a lot of things we never thought we would, and also met people we never thought we would. Things even PBL might not be able to show us. I'm looking forward to seeing the world again. I feel like a "katak di bawah tempurung" meaning someone isolated from the rest of the world.

 

The hours are crazy. There are days when prdctn begins at 6am, ends at 3am, and just when you thought they'd be so kind to give you some rest time the next day, they say everyone has to be back at office by 7.30 am. 

But i'm compelled to say... we do learn a lot, as much as i'd like to deny. In school it's okay to exceed deadlines cos the most you get is a downgrade. But here, you do it late you're dead shrimp. Things that we used to push aside back in poly begin to take importance such as prioritising, discipline, time management, quick thinking, being prepared for quick sudden changes. So long as we prepare things on time, everyone's happy. it can be done but prblm is, the props are all over the place. Even after organizing, there is a tendency of misplacing something because we don't know where every thing is. 

And when asked to do something, you hav to do it fast.. like superman fast. when asked to do something, you RUN. if you don't, you'll hear mr director and friends screaming at your ass in the next second. But they have their reasons. We found out everytime we delay prdctn, it overruns the expected timing, it screws the director's plans and entire plan of the day, and more overtime pay has to be paid to the crew, and there's no use for all this cos everyone wants to do it well but quickly, then go home and rest.

 

But one thing i hate most.. unreasonable scoldings. I think its goblok getting screamed at for something you didn't do or aren't responsible for. I dont mind getting scolded for smth I'm supposed to be responsible for. But there's no point trying to reason with them, they don't listen... most of the time.

There is of course brighter things to look to. like seeing the cast and the rest of the crew cos they're funny to talk to, with 15 or more years of experience under their belt. they share what they've been through with us. and apparently a lot of them started not knowing how to do alot of things. And started it like us. And then we just talk about everyday life. Some complain about how screwed up the industry is, some say they have no choice and just suck it in.

But that's the great thing about meeting new people from outside, they rope you in to their other future projects. Ranging from events to theatre. But it's alright, it's nice to try a little here and there, like a buffet spread. delish.